Feels like I'm imprisoned and idk what else to do I can't force myself to do anything?

Hello :D I don't know about where you are, but here, in Singapore, it is against the law to not send children to school. It is NOT normal to stay at home for such long periods of time, and in fact, I'm amazed that you managed for so long. I suggest you look online for some help lines in your area, for people in crisis. Hang in there. You've already held on so long.